The motorboat in the lagoon in the back of the Mehtas’ house had an inflated snake on top to keep the seagulls away so they didn’t try to beg for food or go to the bathroom on their heads or their boat to have to clean up. It was a little white boat that had “Tried by Fire” on the back.
“So many words for such a small boat,” Jeeji noted to its owners, who got embarrassed. “I mean,” she said, trying to recover. “That it dominates the entire back of the boat!”
“I heard on the news,” Muhammad said, gracefully changing the subject. “That there is a problem with snakes in southern Florida.” They all acted extremely interested, of course, considering the circumstances. “The authorities can’t get rid of the Southeast Asian pythons.”
“I saw that on the Internet,” Farrah said, a little overly enthusiastically so Muhammad had to kick her under the table.
“There’s a video of one swallowing a seventy-five pound deer, whole!” she said.
“Did you see it?” Jeeji asked.
“Almost.”
“They’re swimming around the entire area,” Muhammad said. “They can thrive in that environment.”
“I heard that many animals get loose at Miami’s airport,” Vijay said.
“It’s a big international airport,” Jeeji added.
“Yes, and the giant African rat has plagued Key West.”
“Ironic,” said Muhammad.
“What?” asked Jeeji.
“Oh, nothing,” he said.
“It’s got to be something,” she said.
“What? That snakes and rodents are invading Key West?” Farrah joked and Muhammad smiled.
The Singhs didn’t get it.
“I was watching The Tonight Show, years ago, when Johnny Carson was on it,” Farrah said. “And Johnny, Ed, Doc and an animal trainer held a twenty-four foot long python on the stage.”
“Twenty-four feet!” said Vijay. “That’s a lot for dinner!”
“You’d eat that?” asked Muhammad.
“I’d eat anything, if I was hungry enough!”
“He eats everything!” his wife added.
“Good! Because we’re going out to a restaurant that serves lion, zebra, snakes, frogs, for appetizers,” said Farrah.
“She’s been meaning to take me there for months,” said Muhammad. “But I refuse to eat any of those things.”
“You will,” Jeeji said.
“He never will,” Farrah corrected her. Then she continued her story of the python, who was the star of The Tonight Show, among other things: “The python was found underneath someone’s porch in Florida,” she began, and she had command of the party. “Children had told their father that a huge snake lived under their house and he didn’t believe them. He thought they were only joking. Or making up stories. But cats and dogs were missing in the neighborhood, and then one day, the father saw the snake, going under their porch! He rounded up the children and brought them down to the police station; and the animal control people got it out.”
They were all amazed.
“The snake is very docile when fed,” she said.
“Twenty-four feet… How much did it weigh?”
“I don’t remember.”
“Anyone have a calculator?” Muhammad joked.
But Vijay was running numbers in his head: “Let’s see,” he said. “Twenty-four feet long…”
“By one foot in diameter,” Jeeji said.
The Singhs were figuring it out while the Mehtas had nothing to do but watch. But the Singhs were cold, calculating bankers who merely moved other peoples’ money around; the Mehtas were entrepreneurs who actually built things that helped people.
“I hate snakes!” Jeeji said. “Cancel our holiday in Florida, Vijay.”
The water in Barnegat Bay is very shallow. In some parts it is only three feet deep. Motor boats can race across those waters, and jet skis, but Muhammad, Farrah, Vijay and Jeeji were on sailboards. None of them were very good at it, as standing on and maneuvering a huge surfboard with a mast with a sail stuck in the middle of it can be extremely difficult in the wind. I’ve tried it; but I don’t know why anyone else does.
In the shadow of the Singhs’ yacht, “Green Desire”, parked nearby, they sailed until they couldn’t handle difficult turns and the wind blew them over; or they got tired, which can happen very quickly.
Jeeji was the most talented of the bunch. While the others had nice runs they sometimes lost control and had to pick up the mast and sails out of the water but Jeeji was windsurfing all over the bay. She was having lots of fun until she saw a long, gray tube or something right in front of her and she panicked and ran into it and her sailboard stopped short and she was catapulted into the water. Frightened, she quickly got on the sailboard and lifted her legs out of the water. Jeeji was frozen and kneeling on the board. In the meantime, she was being swept down the channel towards the lighthouse, to the ocean.
“Where’s Jeeji?” Farrah asked her husband.
“I don’t know,” Vijay said. “Let me call her.”
They all had cellphones in waterproof casings and Jeeji took hers out. “Hi, Vijay. Vijay, I’m having difficulty in this channel.”
“She’s in the channel,” Vijay told the Mehtas.
“The tide is going to pull her out to sea!” Farrah said.
“That’s because of the tide,” Vijay told his wife. “It’s pulling you out to sea!”
“Help me!” she yelled.
“She needs help!” Vijay told them.
Farrah immediately dove into the water.
“Where’s she going?” Vijay asked Muhammad.
“She’s helping her,” he smiled.
In the lagoon, by her house, Farrah climbed aboard “Tried by Fire”, the little motorboat, and put the key in the ignition, and before you could say green tambourine she passed Muhammad, and Vijay, with his mouth wide open, and sped towards the lighthouse.
Jeeji was nowhere in sight. Farrah stopped the boat and took out a pair of binoculars. She scanned the ocean. Far off, she could see a Coast Guard cutter and then she spotted Jeeji, who was riding up and down on the waves on her sailboard, being pulled out to sea. Farrah raced over. She had to make it over there before the Coast Guard arrived.
The ocean was different from the bay for the tiny boat. If Farrah went too fast, she might wreck her hull. But she got to Jeeji before the Coast Guard. “Quick!” she told her. “Get on board!”
“Oh, Farrah, you don’t know what I’ve been through…” Jeeji cried.
“There’s no time to talk! Grab my hand!” So Jeeji grabbed Farrah’s hand and got on board. Then Farrah dove into the water.
Farrah! What are you doing! Jeeji thought.
Farrah pulled the sailboard close to the boat. “Next to your foot is a rope,” she said. “Gimme it!” Farrah looked and saw the Coast Guard cutter coming toward them. Jeeji gave Farrah the rope and Farrah proceeded to tie the sailboard to the side of the boat. Just then, the Coast Guard pulled up. And on it was a man with a nice tan and a beard. He looked more like one of The Beach Boys or Jesus Christ than a captain of the Coast Guard.
“Farrah!” the captain smiled. “I thought it was someone else. Everything okay?”
“The sea’s a little too much for us to handle, today,” she said as she smiled. “And lot’s of white-caps in the bay.”
“That’s where I’m headed for,” he said. “Someone dumped some obstructive tubing that could damage someone’s boat. Can you imagine?”
“I can’t imagine,” she said.
